My Faith Lights My Way
I’ve been reflecting on and prioritizing my personal values a lot lately. Looking back through my journals from the past few years and highlighting specific themes and ideas, I notice in my writing that I’ve established a strong sense of my values and what they mean to me. That’s not to say that I’ve always been the best at honoring them. Honoring them has been a learning and healing process. And if I’m living out a few of those values honestly, this will undoubtedly continue to be an ongoing learning and healing process on this side of heaven.
God has recently challenged me to ask myself how I live out my values. He’s asking me to consider whether my values shift with the seasons; do they change, or do I change their order of priority based on my circumstances? And how am I honoring my values for the good of others and not just myself?
I am reflecting on whether I am living a life that honors what I value. I’m considering, am I merely claiming one thing and living another? Am I just existing? Am I honoring this one life gifted to me by my creator, or am I wasting time? And am I honoring God by the things that I consistently place value in?
For me, “faith” makes the top of my list. And experience has shown me why God means for it to stay positioned as first on my list. He’s also shown me how all of my other values must not only be drawn down from my faith but why faith should be what helps me navigate each situation and circumstance I encounter in life.
Within the last year, something as simple as writing “faith” at the top of my personal values list changed things for me. But before I get to that, I have to point out how God sets us up for what’s coming next and how He connects the things that influence and impact us from one season to the next.
In 2021, I read the book “Called Out” by Paula Faris. 2021 was also the year I chose “purpose” as my focus word. In her book, Faris says, “In fact, I believe that everything we do (our vocational calling) serves as a vehicle to share who we are - people loved by God and called to love God and share His love with other people in this world (our faith calling). And if we’re going to live a life of meaning and purpose, we have to make our faith calling our priority.” I highlighted this statement in 2021 because it spoke to me about something God knew I desired at that time.
During that same year, I have written in the margins of one of my journals the following statements,
“Cling to your values.”
“Live life by your values.”
“Value what is valuable to others.”
“We have to leave what’s familiar to step into a new season of influence and expansion. This runs parallel to the inheritance of a new blessing.”
I’m not sure who said these things, but they influenced me so significantly that here we are more than halfway through 2023, and I am still referring back to my notes from 2021. God gives us these nuggets and urges us to reference them when He wants us to connect the dots.
Which brings me to last month - July 2023…
I will never forget the first time I encountered the presence of the Holy Spirit in one of my counseling sessions. Tears streaming down my face, I made eye contact with my counselor after she stopped the buzzing of the therapy pulsars I held lightly in my hands. Instantly, I sensed the sweet presence of significant healing in the counseling room. And I then wondered how I could even put this encounter with an omnipresent God into words for her.
Through various lifelong memories, the negative thoughts “I am unworthy of love” and “I have to be perfect to be loved” have crept into my thinking. Along with my faith and relationship with God, I have also sought the support of a trusted counselor to help guide me through my healing process.
Friends, let me be candid here; when we believe our negative thoughts (aka, the lies of the enemy), we not only risk allowing people and circumstances to compromise our values and self-worth, we block the love of God from penetrating the unhealed cracks and crevices of our hearts. And we prevent all that we can experience through His love for us.
Returning to that particular day, we began the session with me identifying the first time I remembered feeling and believing I was unworthy of love. Without going into too much detail about the counseling approach itself, the goal for our session was for me to increase (on a scale of 1-10) my belief that I am worthy of love and I don’t have to be perfect to be loved. So, as I settled into the sofa and held the pulsars in each hand, I held my breath and waited for my counselor’s cue to begin.
As soon as I looked past her face and met the gaze of the sea-kissed colored wall behind her, it was as if God had physically stepped directly into our space. These were the words I felt deep within my spirit. And this is my paraphrased recollection of God’s words for me that day.
“You claim that your number one value is your faith. Yet, you mistakenly believe you are unworthy of love. Haven’t you felt protected as it is said you are in Psalm 5:11-12? Do you believe you are a Child of God, as stated in 1 John 3:1? And weren’t you adopted into my family as it says you were in Ephesians 1:5?
You have identified your faith as the most essential part of who you are, yet you do not accept the unconditional love that I have for you. As said in Romans 5:8, you forget that you can do nothing to separate yourself from the love of your heavenly Father.
Remember who you belong to. Free yourself from these thoughts that keep you chained outside the parameter of my love for you. Believe that you will continue to heal and grow to be used as my vessel, glorifying the name of Jesus. And demonstrate that your values begin and end with your faith.”
Processing this supernatural encounter with my counselor differed significantly from how I typically process memories with her. That day, I hadn’t visualized a conversation with a family member or watched myself as if I were a character playing a lead role in a film. This session was a divine appointment with my heavenly Father- an appointment that meant healing for my heart, mind, and spirit that day.
In January this year, my counselor and I began discussing my values. We had covered a lot of complex territory over the previous six months, and it was time for me to take the next step in learning to maintain my progress. It was time for more exercises to complete outside the counseling room too. And more exercises meant homework…fun fact about me- I love homework! Notice numbers eight and nine on the list below.
This is a list of my top 10 values in order of importance.
Faith
Empathy
Compassion
Solitude
Freedom
Authenticity
Integrity
Growth
Learning
Excellence
The progression of healing I’ve experienced over this past year has required learning a process for reframing thoughts that have previously held me captive and made me more vulnerable to the lies of the enemy. One of my favorite Christian communicators, Hosanna Wong, calls him - “the enemy of our souls.” And that is precisely what Satan is. He is the enemy of our souls and wants more than anything for us to feel stuck and trapped in an endless cycle of negative thoughts like, “I am unworthy of love,” “I can’t stand up for myself,” “I’m not good enough,” “I am all alone,” “I am stuck,” “This is how it will always be,” etc.
But, God. God is the love of our souls. And if we are willing to allow Him, He will work through many avenues, such as His word, our worship, trusted friends, loving family members, or counselors to name a few. God will guide us to a higher level within ourselves. And He will help us identify our values and who we are in Him rather than who we are to the world or inside our distorted thinking. When we learn to set boundaries and honor our values, we understand how much our Heavenly Father loves us.
From the first time I stepped into my counselor’s office in August 2022 to the day I encountered God during a most recent session, He was healing my heart, spirit, and mind of struggles and strongholds that had gripped me for as long as I could remember. And within that supernatural process, He has prepared me for whatever comes next.
God has strategically aligned my progress in counseling with His will for my life. He has gone before me and gone home with me after each session. And God began that work before I arrived at my counselor’s office for the first time in 2022.
While reading Paula Faris’ book, “Called Out,” and writing notes in my journal during the year of “purpose” in 2021, God spoke to my heart about identifying and honoring my values. And although I tucked some of that away, divine timing would reveal that faith would come first, and my faith would always light my way.
My top 10 values reflected in scripture-
“Whoever believes in me, as the Scripture has said, ‘Out of his heart will flow rivers or living water.’” John 7:38
This is faith.
“Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep.” Romans 12:15
This is empathy.
“Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves in with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.” Colossians 3:12
This is compassion.
“Jesus often withdrew to the wilderness for prayer.” Luke 5:16
This is solitude.
“Wherever the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.” 2 Corinthians 3:17
This is freedom.
“But you have received the Holy Spirit, and he lives within you, so you don’t need anyone to teach you what is true. For the Spirit teaches you everything you need to know, and what he teaches you is true-it is not a lie. So just as he has taught you, remain in fellowship with Christ.” 1 John 2:27
This is authenticity.
“And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.” Philippians 4:8
This is integrity.
“When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away my childish things. Now we see things imperfectly, like puzzling reflections in a mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity. All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely. Three things will last forever-faith, hope and love- and the greatest of these is love.” 1 Corinthians 13:11-13
This is growth and learning.
“We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not ourselves. 2 Corinthians 4:7
This is excellence.
This is my faith. My faith is what determines my entire list. My faith is the beginning, and it is the end. And my faith lights my way.
